The Time Madonna Made Kevin Costner Feel Humiliated: “I Was Embarrassed”
Even at the height of his career as one of Hollywood’s most popular, bankable leading men, Kevin Costner was never exactly what you’d call “cool.”
Sure, he had an old-school charm, undeniable screen presence, and a distinctly American charisma, but when it came to fashion and edge, he just didn’t have that spark. And honestly, he didn’t seem to mind — even if it meant getting a little red-faced when someone truly cool made him look awkward in front of everyone.
Back in the early 1990s, while Costner was ruling the box office, Madonna was dominating the music world. The ‘Queen of Pop’ was a groundbreaking artist — fearless, boundary-breaking, and unapologetically herself. She was a cultural force who didn’t care what anyone thought.
One of the ways to capitalize on a superstar’s popularity is through a concert film. Madonna did just that with Truth or Dare, documenting her Blond Ambition tour. The film went on to become the highest-grossing documentary of all time, even if Madonna got a Razzie nomination for ‘Worst Actress’—playing herself, no less.
The backstage scenes featured plenty of celebrity cameos, but one moment stood out as painfully awkward for Costner. At a Los Angeles show, he greeted Madonna and called her performance “neat.” The word choice was so bland and underwhelming that it instantly made him look out of touch.
What followed was even worse. As soon as he walked away, Madonna mimed gagging, implying that Kevin Costner’s “neat” comment was enough to make her sick. Then she added, “Anybody who says my show is ‘neat’ has to go,” making it clear she thought his praise was laughably weak.
Years later, Costner admitted to the Los Angeles Times that the whole thing embarrassed and stung him. “Yeah, I was embarrassed by it and kind of hurt by it,” he said. “I just went back there because I was asked to go back. And I found the best word that I could. I never called it on her or whatever.”
So, while Costner lost what little cool factor he had, the story didn’t end there. Eventually, Madonna apologized. But ironically, he felt awkward about that, too. In the 2000s, after taking his kids to one of her concerts, he suddenly heard her say on stage, “I want to apologize to Kevin Costner.”
He recalled, “About the third song in, the lights were down, and she said, ‘I want to apologise to someone.’ And all of a sudden, my face starts to get hot. She just said it very simply. Ninety-eight percent of the audience didn’t know what she was talking about. But I really respected that.”
The apology was a long time coming, and it finally gave Costner some closure on that cringe-worthy first encounter with the pop icon. Not that it kept him up at night, but hearing him call Madonna’s show “neat” three decades later is still enough to make you feel a little sorry for how awkward he was back then.
